kenzielilyton's Momaroo

Life...crazy, safe and sane!

Fri, 24 Apr 2009 13:38:48 GMT

This last month has been hectic and nutty, between the holiday and finally getting a tempory order in place so that my ex could have visitation with our children. So I have had my "babies daddy" drama and my boyfriend has had his "baby momma" drama!

I'll start with his drama....so DHS started taking child support out of his check for his son, which is perfectly ok, great even....I don't have to work it in with the bills as it is paid every week, but L as we will call her, demanded the money we had already set aside for her and decided to use their son as a means to get it. WTF is wrong with people who care nothing for their kids feelings and make it all about the money?!?!?!? Ok so after a few nasty phone calls from her and texts she stopped, until it came time for our weekend. She called early in the morning on that Friday and as my BF is deaf I could hear everything she said. It made me sick to hear just how much the money meant to her and her sons feelings didn't count. But I had talked to my BF about his rights and told him not to back down when it came to getting his son for the weekend. It also amazes me how calm he was when being faced with the possibilty of her not "letting" him have his visitation and because he stayed firm she relented and we were albe to get him for the weekend and the holiday. Again I am constantly wondering how can a parent care more about the money than the childs feelings on seeing the other parent?

On to my drama.....begining of the month I get a phone call from my ex's ex wife, telling me that I have to drop the protective order so D (2 of my babies daddy) could have his rights....back in Feb he could have shown up to court and the tempory order would have been put in place then but I was the only one to show. I paid my attorney extra to draft one and have it sent to his attorney who sat on it till the begining of this month. I am not at fault for him being unable to see his children and it broke my heart everytime my daughter would ask for her daddy. At the same time I could not let her go see him without a custody order in place due to the fact that he took her into hiding while I was giving birth to our son. So I kindly explained that to ex wife, but she would hear none of it. I am sad that my relationship with her is in such a bad place because now I can't see or talk to my stepson who is half brother to 2 of my children. I love him very much but I would not ask him to betray his mom or dad by talking to me. I have this neat little feature on my phone, the reject list and any number added to it will go straight to voice mail and texts are kicked back, I had to add her to it because she decided to start non stop texts and phone calls. On to the relaity of the tempory order.....I was prepared to let the kids see/meet (as in my 3 1/2 month old son) their dad....counted on him wanting to see them....nope he hopped into his truck and left the state. So again he decided not to see his kids. 3 weeks later he comes back, I set it up for our daughter to go see him and our son to go over for 2 hrs each day, we are nursing buddies, and it goes very rough but in all ok. Then on Sunday I, trying to be nice, ask if he might want to see his son during the week. He promptly turned it into seeing our daughter and not our son and had me agreeing because he said he was going back out of town in 2 days. I did veto her staying the night, which made him very angry, but my kids need constancy and a middle of the wek overnight just doesn't happen. So I let him have an extra visit and when I went to pick her up he demanded to see her again in 2 more days....WTF.....he was supposed to be leaving the state again?! So I said I would call him and let him know the next day. I was feeling so manipulated and lied to....I was so angry that he would use her and me that way.....I waited 2 days before I call him so I could be calm when I spoke to him. I let him know the above things and we had a small break through which became me agreeing to let her stay the night tonight and her coming home in the morning. He says he is leaving in the afternoon on Sat and won't be back for 3 weeks. 1. If he is stupid enough to take her again, there is an order in place which states that I have custody, and if he crosses state lines it becomes federal. 2. I wrote down a description of his truck and took pictures of it with my phone. 3. If he does not go out of town like he says he will, I will not allow any more out of order visitations. I am not doing this for him....it is for my 3 year old baby girl who LOVES her dad and needs to spend time with him.

If you got this far I applaude you!!!! My disjointed writing and run on sentences must have caused a few headachs. But I feel better...lol!

An experience I never wanted to have!

Tue, 10 Mar 2009 01:20:08 GMT

My 10 week old son will be having a routine surgery on Thursday, the 12th. He was born with an inguinal hernia and it is not something that can repair itself. I am mentally flipin' out while at the same time I know that this is the absolute best time possible for him to have it repaired. He isn't mobil yet, we are still exclusively breast feeding, and he won't remember a thing about it.

I have always been a "my kids never been to the hospital" bragger but that changed (this last year due to my youngest daughter having gotten staples twice and glued back together once) to my kids have never been admitted to the hospital.... now I am in the group of my child has to / had surgery. I keep asking myself what could I have done different when he was in the womb (that is when it happened), while I know that there is likely nothing I could have done to prevent it I am still asking.

He is my angel, my God child. It took only once to place him here on this earth, in my family and he is an amazing blessing. Yes, damit, I am scared, routine or not it is still dangerous and the possibilty is there that something could go wrong and he would be gone from my life. I could not bear that. I will not say anymore I just had to let that out.

So I am gonna flip put some more and pray like I have never prayed in my entire life till Thursday....

Relief and sadness

Tue, 10 Feb 2009 13:47:32 GMT

Ok so after all that stress and worry neither he nor his attorney showed up for court. Also his "attorney" hasn't filed with the courts saying that he is his attorney?!

I am sad for our 3 year old daughter who is asking when she can see her daddy and that she misses him. How much is she going to have to go through before he gets it through his thick head??? But she has gone long periods of time without seeing him before so it isn't as tramatic as her not seeing me. Yes I do realize she is stressed over not seeing him.

Relief is huge!!! My lawyer was very confident that with Eastons hernia and that we are nursing I don't have anything to worry about on long visit times when visitation gets set up. But for my peace of mind I expressed 2 oz yesterday and last night while I was busy in the kitchen I had my boyfriend try giving Easton a bottle. He took it after a few minutes and ate both oz, but had a little trouble latching on when I went to nurse him an hour later. It was like he wanted it to be in his mouth without having to suck it in...lol! So I will wait another month before trying again, I am so not going to risk nipple confusion and he was a bit last night.

Now it is a waiting game I guess....

Worried and Tired

Sat, 07 Feb 2009 16:46:11 GMT

On Monday I have court to start my divorce and we will be setting up visitation with my 2 youngest children father. I am worried that he may try to run and hide with our 3 year old daughter again, he did this while I was in the hospital birthing our son, and I am worried about how we can set up visitation with a nursing baby who is almost 6 weeks old?!

Easton was born with a very common but potently harmful hernia that will have to be fixed and since we are nursing it isn't as emergent as it would be if he were on formula and having hard stools. Yes I can pump and he can get a bottle but his sister got nipple confusion and we had a very rough 3 months while she learned the right way to nurse on mamma....so painful!!! Also since he took our daughter and went into hiding with her for 3 days then used her as blackmail to "try" to make me agree to stuff I wouldn't otherwise agree to I had to get a protective order that will stand until our divorce is final so he can't be around me meaning I can't be there while he is visiting his dad.

What do I do?? I feel terrible that he has only seen his son once when he was 3 days old and I got our daughter back but that was his choice to do what he did and without custody in place it was legal, it was traumatizing to our daughter who had never been without me more than 1 night and was away from me for 6 days but legally it was fine. So he has missed out on his son and also his daughter turned 3 and he wasn't able to celebrate it with her.

Ok so I am a mess right now and not sure how this will workout. The best I can do is pray that everything will work out the way it is supposed to and talk to my attorney.

Thursday, January 29, 2009

Thu, 29 Jan 2009 20:02:06 GMT

Hey I am a mom to 3 kiddos full time and 4 part time so I will get on here when I have time...lol!